Joke

There once was a peasant who had a long-standing obsession with a queen’s breasts. This man knew the penalty to touch her would mean death, yet he revealed his secret desire to the king’s chief doctor. The doctor promised he could arrange for the man to satisfy his desire, but it would cost him one thousand gold coins. Though he didn’t have the money, the man readily agreed to the scheme.

The next day the physician made a batch of itching powder and poured some into the queen’s bodice while she bathed. After she dressed, she began itching and itching and itching. The physician was summoned to the Royal Chambers, and he informed the king and queen that only a special saliva, if applied for several hours, would cure this type of itch. And only one man in the whole of the Kingdom had the correct chemistry – a wizard, living in disguise as peasant.

The king summoned the “wizard”. Meanwhile, the physician slipped him the antidote for the itching powder, which the man put into his mouth, and for the next few hours, the peasant worked passionately on the queen’s breasts. The queen’s itching was eventually relieved, and the man left satisfied and touted as a hero.

When the physician demanded his payment, the now satisfied peasant refused. He knew that the physician could never report what really happened to the king. So the next day, the physician slipped a massive dose of the same itching powder into the king’s loincloth. And the king immediately summoned the wizard.